Tags: allergies, ankles, blood vessels, calves, Charley horse, Charley horses, cramps, exercise, eye, fitness, IBS, injuries, knees, leg cramps, runner, runner injuries, running, shin splints, shins, woes
It is not unusual for my body to hate me so much. I have IBS and I get random pains from that in addition to the bloating, farting, and other poop pains.
How about a few minutes ago, I felt like I was just kicked in the kidneys? That happens quite often, with varying degrees of intensity.
I also seem to be getting major leg cramps and Charley horses, which is weird for me. Low potassium? I’ve tried that method. When I bend over to take off a shoe, I get a massive cramp in the back of my knee. I also love when I get cramps in my feet, but that is not as usual nowadays since I stopped my part-time job convincing people to buy new bath products.
But lately there have been some even weirder things happening (rare, I know.)
Tags: body, body issues, body obsessed, buff, fat, fitness, health, healthy, IBS, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, perfection, toned, vegan
I’ve never had the best body image. It probably began when I hit puberty and BAM! hello, two ginormous thighs! I have always hated them, except when they proved useful (which was rarely.)
I also was a cheerleader for 11 years, which does WONDERS for self esteem when you can’t tumble and you don’t get onto varsity until your senior year. Don’t forget about those short skirts.
After that, I started to not give a crap about my body, concentrating more so on my studies. My weight stayed the same through college, except for senior year. I got sick, discovered I had IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome) and constantly got bloated.
Step in a number of other factors in the four years since college graduation: New work places, new work hours, new diet (vegan!) and then getting comfortable with the boyfriend.
I fully embraced my vegan lifestyle. With new developments in vegan foods, I got to enjoy the emergence of new fake meats, frozen dinners, melt-able non-dairy cheese and so much more. As vegans, we are constantly trying to prove that vegan versions are better than meat-filled versions, but somewhere in there the vegan versions are not better calorie-wise.
It is oh so good, yummy in my tummy, but absolutely horrible for my thighs!
And somewhere, in a matter of 8 years, I ballooned an additional 26 pounds! Yes, for my small 5’4″ frame, that isn’t so good. The boyfriend obviously said he didn’t care: “more to grab onto; you got curves, etc.”
With so many fit women around me on the blogosphere and a few good looking coworkers, my other examples in real life aren’t so good. The mom realized her bad ways and has tried Weight Watchers (lost close to 30 pounds!) My dad almost had his second heart attack and now is going practically vegan.
On Jan. 1, 2012, I realized that I need to eat better and I took the step to lose 30 pounds in a year.
I fill my Pinterest with toned, buff women and inspirational quotes. I try my best to get rid of the bad food (try, try!)
It has definitely been a struggle, and then it makes me think, “Am I body obsessed?”
I love who I am as a person inside. I am intelligent, thoughtful, caring, giving, loving. I am a pretty unique and special person, but my outer layer doesn’t express the same thing.
I feel uncomfortable in my own skin, and I could blame it on IBS (bloating, flatulence and bowel movements don’t make me feel pretty or well.) But I have felt this way since I was 12. Since I began wearing Adidas pants and big T-shirts to hide my weird body. Since I banned shorts except for exercise because I felt like a cow.
Do you have/had body issues? How do you deal with them, or have dealt with them? If you are a bit older, what advice do you have for a young women like myself?
Tags: allergies, cold, IBS, sick, vegan
So, here I am again. I have been in this deep winter funk, and I noticed from a lot of blogs that I follow that I am not the only one.
Well, two weeks ago, the sun started to shine again and I didn’t freeze the moment I stepped out the door! Life became glorious and I was ready to run again and welcome spring.
My allergies did not agree.
I came down with a nasty cold/nasty allergy attack. Two days of severe throat hurt followed by at least a week’s worth of blowing my nose continuously. Well, I am still sick, blowing my nose, nursing a headache and continuing to show up for work (because my boss sprang a project on me the day I started to become ill.)
The weekend came, my project was amazingly complete and I couldn’t wait to rest and relax. To cook on Monday and to blog about it. To maybe get some new eyeglasses after my eye appointment.
Well, I woke up Tuesday and my stomach was grumbling. IBS, don’t hate me now! Well, it definitely did. And all I have eaten today was a few carbs.
What happened to my plans of detox, lots of good foods and starting my training again so I could maybe not die at my next 5K? Plans foiled again by my intestines.
And I can never explain it. It could have been the vegan noodle soup I made, despite being a help for sick people (so the blog told me.) It could have been the Oreos. Or my trusty ginger ale. Could be a number of other issues I deal with in my life, but see, my stomach never tells me. It just rebels.
Let’s just hope I’ll be back up and at ‘em tomorrow.
Tags: diet, enemy, foodie, IBS, love, vegan
When I was diagnosed with IBS about three years ago, I thought my life was over.
I liked to cook but I never gave food a second thought. Now, food became the enemy.
Well, here I am, three years later and a total foodie. Vegan foodie, that is. But I have walked into a dilemma that I just can’t shake.
I have gained a considerable amount of weight.
Now, when food was the enemy, it was a miracle to get through the day without getting nauseous, gassy, bloaty or other disgusting digestive perils. Food was just getting me from point A (waking up every day) to point B (going to bed every night.) I didn’t care what it tasted like, as long as it was bland and my body didn’t reject it. I had a large revolving list of “no” food. I wasn’t worried about weight gain (so much), I was worried that I would never be able to enjoy life again. Food was my everything, but in a bad way.
Then I became vegan and food became enjoyable again. Slowly, I fell in love with the different ways I could make my now safe foods and I was embracing more vegetables than I ever had. I didn’t count calories, fat, salt, fiber, etc. I ate to my heart’s desire and when I was hungry. I experimented (cautiously) and tried new items on menus. If I felt like carbs all day, every meal, then gosh darnit, I ate it! If I felt like a big bowl of pasta at 1 a.m., down the hatchet.
But I have now figured out, about 1.5 years later, that this food love is making me … possibly larger. I have a tummy tire and flabby arms and legs. But see, I have always had this since IBS. I exercise too infrequent. I have been a size 10 for about 4 years now, yet I am having difficulty with clothing when I go out to buy it, despite all the clothes fitting me fine at home.
What has bothered me is, my mom said I should be losing weight on this vegan diet. How could I have gained?
Well, I blame my nocturnal schedule, my birth control pills and my love for a 1/2 of box of spaghetti noodles at 1:30 a.m. most nights (or toast or anything carb-related.) Oh, and again, that infrequent gym sessions.
Well, a friend of mine recently told me about her diet wonder with Weight Watchers. She lost 26 pounds in 3.5 months. WHA??? First I thought, “you go, girl!” Then I thought I wanted the same results. But this is Weight Watchers! I am vegan! And I spend enough money as it is on weird vegetables and products, along with expensive visits to Baltimore to indulge in vegan food love. I must spend every waking moment on food and all my money on it, too! (I spent $300 on groceries alone in December, and that’s not including vegan eateries or the $32 on my Discover from the day before Christmas.)
Then I started getting concerned. I have worried about my weight since 5th grade, when I wouldn’t wear shorts all summer because I hated my thighs. I always wanted to go on a diet but could never make myself. I wanted to be down a good 20 pounds for the past 5 years. The closest I got to that was last winter, when I was training myself for an indoor triathlon and did doubles every day for about a month.
So, last week when my friend told me her success story (and I could see it in her FB photos. She is adorable!), I couldn’t help but fret my life away as time ticked closer to the new year. Was I really going to do it, once and for all, and go on an official diet? Was I going to banish carbs finally from my eating habits?
Well, after today, I decided a big, fat NO!
I am not going on an official diet.
Being vegan is difficult enough and I have already eaten my fair share of salad and battled with temptation to eat animals and their byproducts. (but why do the restaurants have to make them smell so good?!?) I am just going to rein in my carb overloading, eat less fatty foods (oils, nuts, etc.) and try to eat a better balanced diet. That doesn’t mean I won’t indulge from time to time, but that term is key.
And I am going to kick it hardcore at the gym. HARDCORE. I want to be healthy and I want to run a better 5K in April.
I am not giving up my love for food, just because I might be a little round for a vegan.